Diary Of an Ibadan Girl: Entry 6


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On The Day.

Morenike! Morenike o!!

It felt like I could hear someone call my name from a thousand miles with a megaphone. I didn’t care who it was, I couldn’t answer just yet. It was crucial that I remained where I was at that moment. I was just about to get answers to questions. Nothing was going to ruin that for me. Especially not people that sounded like Jarvis. 

Oko mi. Dide nle. Ma ma b’olojo sun-un!“, “My dear. Wake up. Don’t set with the day!”, the Jarvis voice said.

(Yoruba people believed it’s not ideal for one to sleep while the sun is setting. They often feared that such a person might not wake again).

By this time, I was already feeling a slight tap on my shoulder.  At that same moment, the vision of the man standing before me disappeared and I was slowly brought back to consciousness. I opened my eyes and I saw my mother standing over me, beside my bed. She had that smug look she always have on her face when she was about to chastise me.

Maami.“, I said while yawning, “Ati Igba wo ni moti sun-un?” “Mother, since when have I been asleep?”, I asked my mother.

O ti shey die o. Lati bii aago merin. Wo, Aago mefa lo fe lu yii.“, she said while pointing at the clock that hung on the northern side of my room. “It’s been a while o. Since like 4pm. Look, it’s almost 6pm”, my mother replied.

O gaa o“, I said half heartedly while still yawning. “O ni lati je pe mon la ala niyen” “I must have been dreaming then”, I said.

Ala?” “Dream?”, “Iru Ala wo niyen?” “What kind of dream was it?”, my mother asked as she motioned for me to shift inward so that she could seat on the bed. 

In my mind, I was like “Damn”. Why I ever said that out loud in front of my mother is still totally beyond me. 

Don’t get me wrong. I tell my mother everything. She’s like my go-to person for everything that I can’t handle. So it wasn’t like I was scared or shy to talk to my mother. It’s just that Iya Morenike had her many theories about things like this. Especially a dream that involved a man! 

Mo ti wo leni ” “I am in for it today”, I said to myself in my mind o. 

I looked at her as she sat and I realized there was no getting out of this one. Once my mother was attentive like that, she would drag whatever it was you were holding back out of you. 

Mo wa ninu yara kan bayii ni” “I was in a room like this”, I began but then I paused, hesitatingly. 

Ehn ehn, oya mo ngbo” “Oya, I’m listening”, my mother urged me on.

But yara yen ko kin shey yara mi o. O wa dabi eni pe mo ti sun-un fun bi many hours. Igba ti mo wa ji, mo sha notice pe yara yen yato.” “But the room was not my room o. It was now as if I had slept for long hours. When I woke, I noticed that the room was different”. 

I paused to look at my mother again for effect and I saw that she was still very much listening. So I continued narrating my dream. 

Igba ti mo wa dide lori bed ninu yara yen, mo wa ngbo sound kan. Bi okunrin kan shey Wole si inu yara niyen. Bi mo shey gbo voice yin ti e wa ji mi niyen.” “When I stood up from the bed, I could hear a sound. Then, a man entered into the room. But then I woke when I heard your voice as you came to wake me”, I said. 

I made sure I ended that part with a dramatic yawn so that she would know that I had indeed come to the end of my narrative. There was no way in this world I was going to tell my mother that the man from my dream had been tying a towel. No freaging way! 

Ehn ehn. O gaa o. Bawo wa l’omokunrin yen shey ri? Shey agbalagba ni abi omo kekere? Ki wa lo so fun e loju ala yen?” “How did the man look? Was he old or young? What did he now tell you in the dream?”.

Typical. Just typical. From the moment I began telling my mother about the dream, I knew she was going to ask me endless questions. Most of which I would be unable to answer. 

Maami, mi o mo boya omo kekere ni abi agbalagba. Mi o ri daada. Ko de so nkankan fun mi” “Mother, I can’t tell whether he was young or old. I didn’t see him well. Plus, he didn’t tell me anything.”, I  said lying to my mother and wanting more than anything in the world to end the conversation at that point.

Thing is, for my mother as regards issues like this, the lesser she was told, the better my life would be. Plus, I haven’t even figured out the dream yet. Moreover, it didn’t seem like a big deal to me. Nothing bad sha happened in the dream. Asides from the fact that I found myself in a strange bed. 

Hmm. Ala ibi, Iran ibi o ni shey lori e, oko mi” “Bad visions and dreams shall not come to pass in your life, my dear”, she said prayerfully.

Amin, Maami. Ko si nkankan joor” “Amen, mother. It’s nothing jor”, I told her in an effort to quickly let it slide and take it off her mind. 

Ah. Ko ti e ni si nkankan lagbara oloun” “Ah. There won’t even be a problem by God’s grace”, she replied. 

We’re not exactly superstitious in my family. But there are certain things we do not joke with. One of those things is when one of us has had a dream. My mother always told everyone of us how important it was to always remember one’s dreams. She said, sometimes God shows us the things that he wants to shield us from through our dreams. I have tried to argue that science says different but I don’t want my mother to disown me. 

Ko sha le je oko orun? Abi ki lo ni mo so?” “It sha can’t be a spiritual husband? Or what do you think?”, my mother added. 

People of the world.

All the meandering my mother had been doing since, she finally arrived at her destination.

Maami!! Mi like e o. Ewo ni oko orun bayii?” “Mother, I don’t like it o. Which one is spiritual husband now?”, I said while feigning annoyance. 

Me that I knew my mother very well. 

I already knew she was going to say something ridiculous like that. 

Mabinu o. Hmm. A kuku gbodo soro nipa e. Oloun o ti e ni je kin riru e lori iwo ati aburo e.” “Don’t be angry o. We sha must not even speak of it. God will not even let me experience that sort of thing over you and your sister”, she said as she rose from my bed to leave. 

That was when I finally took a breath.

Shey wa de wa yoju si Yinka bayii? O ma ti de lataaro” “Would you come and see Yinka now then? He’s been here for a while”, she asked as she was about to exit my room. 

That one had come to torture me again with his presence. I didn’t even hesitate before I turned my back to her. Putting my head back on the bed, I said “Yinka kor, Yinka ni“. Maami better get the drift.

Shioor. A to e ti. Shoju bi oju kiniun nbe. Maa lo so fun pe o shin sun-un. Aa kuku mo wahala omo Yinka yen naa ntie” “You’ll be fine. Do your face like that of a lion there. I would go and let him know that you’re still asleep. One doesn’t even know that Yinka’s problem sef”, my mother said to me as she left the room. 

Even my mother knows that Olayinka is a pain in the lower region. 

As soon as my mother left and I was left alone in the room, I picked up my phone to check if I had any calls or messages. Surprisingly, that was how I saw 38 missed calls o. 

Maybe I had really been asleep for 13 hours like I had dreamt, I thought to myself. 

35 of the calls were from Olayinka. This boy wants to be unfortunate, I thought to myself. I was soon going to block him off totally, God knows. 

2 missed calls from Sekky and one from an unknown number that I wasn’t going to call back. Thing is if you have not called me twice, I can’t take you serious. Kind of a stupid policy, but it has kind of stuck. 

I thought about the last time I spoke with Sekky as I dialed her number. I was still thinking about our last conversation when she picked on the second ring.

Booni?” “What’s up?”, I said into the phone as I spoke with my best friend.

“I dey o. Why you no con pick your phone? I’ve called you like a million times nah”, Sekky replied. 

Apparently, two means a million in Sekky’s lingo. 

Mabinu. Mo n sun-un ni” “Sorry. I have been asleep”, I said. 

Oloorun oshi. Ibo lo wa? Oko e ti de o” “Sleepy head. Where are you? Your husband has arrived o”, she said. 

The smile that crept into my voice all of a sudden made it seem like I haven’t smiled in years. 

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